How to saute mushrooms

Mushroom, oh Mushroom, how I love thee

Never will I understand the unreasonably

Unjust assaults that are spewed in your name

Calling you "fungus" and "slimy" and "lame"

Please know that I love you in every way

Stuffed, sautéed, steamed, roasted and plain

Those who speak ill of you have not a clue

The way you enhance foods and have good flavor, too

I love you, dear Mushroom, without you I'd be

Living a life of mushroomless misery

So there! I have poetically shared my love for The Mushroom. Aren't I a nerd.

If you wish to saute a batch of mushrooms (as opposed to writing poetry about them), here is what you will need to do. It's simple!

Melt a couple tablespoons of butter in a skillet over medium heat. I much prefer using butter over oil because I think it makes the mushrooms tastier. But really, you can use either. Whichever one you use, make sure it gets nice and hot without burning it.

Add 8 ounces of fresh, sliced, washed mushrooms to the skillet and toss them around with a spoon or a hard spatula. Make sure the butter coats all surfaces. Stir constantly.

Depending on the type of mushroom and the thickness of the slices, this will take anywhere between 3 and 7 minutes. When they are a golden brown color, I like to turn the heat up to high and cook for 30 seconds to 1 minute longer. This gives their edges a hint of crispness, which I find delicious.

I personally have a hard time sauteeing mushrooms without eating most of the batch. I must exercise supreme self-control if I want more than 80% of them to make it into whatever bigger dish I am making.